Featured post

Welcome to readingremy.com

Glad you stopped by. My blog has evolved over time. It has served as a place for me to discuss topics found in my books. But other times what I discuss turns into a book, as it did with “Out of Exile.”

Because I’m both pastor and an addiction spirituality consultant, I interact with people on how God can help them overcome their problems in practical ways. My writing isn’t super spiritual but down-to-earth, no-nonsense advice. 

My writing isn’t super spiritual but down-to-earth, no-nonsense advice.

A common theme with me is helping people make a comeback. I like to look “under the hood” to find what’s wrong with our thinking, help get things rewired, and then encourage people to trust God to make a way to a new life.

Much of my writing is to pastors; both to help them and to help them help others. But I think everyone can find things here that will help them.

I hope you’ll subscribe to my blog and like my Facebook page in the margin. And feel free to send me a note. I promise to read it and reply. – F. Remy Diederich

God Can Refill Your Losses

Everyone is hit with loss. How you view your losses determines if you get stuck in loss or bounce back.

I’ve talked in other posts about the difference between a scarcity vs. an abundance mindset. Let me contrast these two again with pie charts.pie chart

Each wedge in this chart represents a loss and the damage to your life:

  • A: Abuse
  • B: Rejection
  • C: Failure
  • D: Betrayal
  • E: Your ever shrinking sense of wholeness

If you view your losses through the grid of scarcity, you see your life getting smaller. You become increasingly hopeless as you feel losses chipping away at your life. You wonder if you can hang on any more because bad things keep happening. This view is often accompanied by anger and depression.Pie-chart-icon

But if you look at loss through the grid of abundance, your life isn’t chipped away. The loss causes a temporary set back (the blue wedge) but as you invite God into your life, he helps you to grieve the loss, absorb it, and continue on with your life.

A scar remains, reminding you of the loss, but the wedge is gone. It shrinks back to nothing. So instead of loss chipping away at your life, with God’s influence, loss actually expands you as a person; it makes you deeper and able to be a resource to other hurting people.

I hope this helps you or the people you might work with.

Pastor, Do You Know Your Losses?

I’ve been pleased at the reviews I’ve gotten already on Out of Exile. One person said:

God used Remy … I forgave my offenders, forgave myself, and recalibrated. I’m back in ministry, due in large part to the writings you’ll find in this book. Am I overstating? Not if you knew my story…I’m on the comeback trail. (read the full review here)

I think what strikes people in the book is when they realize the many losses that come with being a pastor. We are trained to absorb the hard things in ministry like notches on our belt or scars of service that each tell a story. We are encouraged to “suck it up” and move on, warriors for Jesus. 

We are trained to absorb the hard things in ministry like notches on our belt or scars of service that each tell a story. We are trained to “suck it up” and move on, warriors for Jesus.

There’s nothing wrong with a pastor incurring loss for Jesus. It comes with the territory. But what IS wrong is brushing our losses under the rug and ignoring them. I think readers of Out of Exile are finding healing because I give them permission to admit and own their losses. This needs to take place in order to adequately grieve your losses and move on.

But instead, we tend to stockpile hurts and offenses that lead us to grow cold and lose our passion for ministry.click-here-to-listen3-150x150

To hear a short interview between my publisher and me, click this link. We discuss ministry losses and I also read Days 2 and 3 from Out of Exile.

After you listen to the podcast, let me know what your losses have been in ministry.

Listen to “Out of Exile” Interview

My publisher released a brief podcast interviewing me about my new book, “Out of Exile…a forty day journey from setback to comeback,” along with a special free offer when you buy the book in paperback. I also read the first few chapters of the book to give you a taste of the theme.Out.of.Exile.angle

LISTEN TO THE PODCAST HERE.

The reviews are slowly getting posted. So far they are all five stars. He’s one of the latest:

Remy takes us on a journey we have all experienced, but often been unable to name and process – the journey of exile. This book is an excellent resource not only for pastors but anyone who is feeling stuck and having trouble identifying and healing from loss. This easy to read book will help you discover why you feel the way you feel, how to identify your primary and secondary losses and what steps you can begin to take to allow God to bring you out of exile into the land of promise. S. Sagle

If you think this book might help people you know, please take a second to share this post. Thanks!

Special Offer on New Book “Out of Exile”

My new book, “Out of Exilea forty day journey from setback to comeback,” is now on sale in both the Kindle and paperback versions.  CrossOut.of.Exile.angle Point Publishing has put together a nice offer for the paperback. Purchase the paperback version of Out of Exile and receive:

Read the full details here on the offer.

Out of Exile is written for pastors working their way out of a painful season of life. But the principles I share will help anyone trying to overcome a setback.

Here’s a recent review of the book:

…this collection of grace-balm words has brought me closer to my God and myself, with plenty of grace to offer to others along the way.

Every so often, a combination of words and phrases becomes more – more than thoughts, more than insight. Flowing from the broken cistern of one who understands, words become grace. As a pastor who has experienced exile on numerous occasions, I have felt incredibly alone, believing that no one understood; at least not those whom I could trust with my brokenness. But F. Remy Diederich has been there; his cistern, cracked and experienced in exile, flows forth words of grace in his new book, Out of Exile. This collection of daily words and questions carefully and respectfully encouraged me to look deeply into my brokenness, to honestly examine my exile, and, so importantly, led me toward a land I’d thought was gone, a land called hope. If healing is coming into right relationship with our God and ourselves, then this collection of grace-balm words has brought me closer to my God and myself, with plenty of grace to offer to others along the way. Out of Exile – a graceful companion to a journey pastors and others may walk again. Michael DeLong

Consider recommending Out of Exile for someone you know going through a hard time. Or maybe even buy them a copy as a gift.

Would you SHARE this post on your Facebook page and blog? I’m a small time author but you could help with the marketing. Thanks so much!

Don’t Buy “OUT OF EXILE”…just yet

Next Tuesday, my latest book, OUT OF EXILE, will go on sale on amazon.com. It’s listed on-line but not for sale yet. Out.of.Exile.angle

Good thing, because if you buy the paperback version next week you will get my other two books for free. Stuck on Kindle, and Healing the Hurts of Your Past, in the audiobook format. (Update: Since posting this, Amazon HAS released the paperback version of my book and it is now available for sale. The Kindle version is set for next Tuesday).

You can get all the details on my publisher’s website.

I got some early praise on Out of Exile from one pastor. He wrote me explaining how he was forced to resign from a large church in the Midwest. Then he said:

So there I was, more hurt and wounded than I had ever been in over 20 years of pastoral ministry. I was disillusioned, out of work, and a complete mess. But then, somehow, I stumbled on your “Out of Exile” writings, and wow… did God use it to restore my soul.
I worked through the first 24 days in about two days, then reviewed and reviewed and reviewed various sections for the next two or three months. God used your writings to significantly restore my soul, my faith in the church, and my internal perspective on God.
Even my wife, and our two sons, regularly said, “What in the world are you reading? You are a different man than you were six months ago.”
I don’t even know where to begin, but THANK YOU. Thank you for allowing God’s inspiration to flow through you. Your thoughts, your encouragements, your challenges were timely and necessary to rebuild in me what had been lost. 

God used your writings to significantly restore my soul, my faith in the church, and my internal perspective on God.

I had an amazingly charmed ministry experience up to this point — I was loved, appreciated, sought after, and though I had certainly faced challenges from time to time in our various churches/ministry experiences, was woefully unprepared for the evil, vile hatred expressed toward us in this overwhelmingly difficult season of ministry. I wanted to quit, not just on the church, but on God as well.
God used you to keep me in ministry. I owe you a huge debt, and I don’t even know you. Thank you so much for restoring my hope in God and my faith in the local church. Name Withheld
I wrote Out of Exile to help restore pastors to a full and vital ministry after going through a dark
time. To hear back from this pastor was so encouraging to me. It made me feel like I hit my
target.
I hope you’ll get the book and share it with other pastors. Be sure to buy it next week (now) and take advantage of the free offers!

Listen to me on WWIB Thursday Morning

I’ll be on a live call-in radio program this morning from 10:00 to 11:00 a.m. CST on WWIB radio.

Thanks to the internet, you can tune in from any computer at wwib.com and listen to the Front Page show with Mark Halverson.wwib

Mark will be talking to me about a variety of things:

  • My speaking at the Leading With Power Men’s lunch next week in Eau Claire, Wisconsin.
  • My new book, Out of Exile
  • The new church we are helping to start in Eau Claire (Renew Covenant Church)
  • My summer sabbatical in Chile.

I hope you will listen in and maybe even call in with a question!

Updating Healing the Hurts of Your Past

Did you read my first book, Healing the Hurts of Your Past?Healing the Hurts of Your Past

If so, was there something missing? Did you need something clarified: some questions answered?

If so, LET ME KNOW. I’m giving it a rewrite, cleaning things up and adding new thoughts.  The book has gotten very good reviews so I’m not messing with the essence of the material. But it was my first book and had some literary weaknesses (i.e. bad writing). Thankfully God has used it in spite of my novice writing skills.

My publisher is working on a new cover too. That tree just looks weird to me! We are thinking of a picture of a broken heart being stitched up. But we are open to suggestions!

Thanks for any input you send my way. I’m looking forward to offering a “new and improved” book for people.