Boundaries Keep People From Draining Your Life

Most of us struggle putting boundaries in place with other people.  But without boundaries we attract the wrong kind of people into our lives.boundaries

It’s like the deer that like to come into my yard. It’s almost impossible to have a garden because deer like to eat vegetables as fast as they grow. The only chance a garden has is if you fence it.  Yes, it takes time, money, and effort to build a fence, but you can finally harvest a crop. It’s amazing how quickly a fence solves the problem (and stops your complaining).

In the same way you need to build personal boundaries with people who take from your life. You might need emotional boundaries, physical boundaries or even legal boundaries. But you need to do whatever it takes to keep people from stealing from you. And just like a fence, the results can be immediate and amazing.

Do You Invite Boundary Breakers?

Some people unknowingly invite “boundary breakers” into their lives. It’s like setting out corn for the deer, inviting them into your yard! Let me explain with an example. Imagine being a boundary breaker (someone who doesn’t hesitate to enter the space of others to get what they want). You scan your acquaintances looking for the person with the weakest boundaries…the person who can’t say “no”. When you find them, you turn on the charm, or the pressure, or whatever it takes to get what you want. 

 you need to do whatever it takes to keep people from stealing from you 

This person doesn’t want people to take advantage of them. They don’t purposefully invite boundary-breakers. They might feel too responsible to say “no”. They might fear the rejection if they say “no”. There are many reasons. But the bottom line is, they can’t say “no” and boundary-breakers can smell it a mile away.

People who can’t say “no” are usually surrounded by boundary-breakers. They gather around weak people like wolves surrounding their prey.

The Stress of Having No Boundaries

Now imagine the stress of being the surrounded person. Everyone expects so much from them. They fear being rejected if they say “no”. They fear the cost of saying “yes” to everyone.  It can be overwhelming . As a result, they often strike out in rage, or medicate to numb the pain, or hide in isolation.

Are you someone who can’t say “no”? If so, I hope you will get the help you need before  boundary-breakers rob you of any more life. You don’t owe them anything. Instead, you owe it to God to take care of the life he gave you. Check the related posts below to learn more about boundaries or check out STUCK…how to overcome your anger and take back your life.

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4 thoughts on “Boundaries Keep People From Draining Your Life

  1. Pingback: Setting Boundaries - Good Questions to Ask - F. Remy Diederich

  2. Pingback: I broke a boundary… | Repairing Shattered Pieces

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